In about 24 hours, I’ll be standing in an airport, in another country, hoping to God that someone amongst our little group has some idea of how to get to the ship we’re booked on for the next seven days.
I do believe I’ve told most of you, Dear Readers, Mina Members, and random blogophiles, that we’re off on a 7-day Caribbean cruise, round about the 20th of September. Tomorrow is the day, finally, and it will commence at about 4am. Today will be filled with last minute details from the mundane – or is that ridiculous? (like making sure the garbage is out, that I’ve called my parents, that I’ve got an adequate selection of jewelry packed, that the litter box is clean enough to withstand 8 days of neglect, that my cats have had treats, brushings, and pettings enough to make up for the fact that they will be only briefly visited every second day) – to the sublime (like making sure tomorrow morning’s XxxMina video update is ready to go…and as a matter of fact it is, so look for it at about 4am EST. That I’ve answered as many messages, emails, and twitters as humanly possible, that I’ve got that one last layer of frosty pink polish on my toenails, that our passports are handy and our luggage is properly tagged).
I don’t think it’s entirely hit me yet because I’m too calm. Historically, even positive change can fuck up my head and I’m the sort of person who rattles herself half to death at the least disruption of her tight little schedule. The idea of being away from my work for a week is also rather daunting, and I already feel guilty about the fact that I’ll be killing all the SpyCams while we’re gone. I do understand there’s Wi-Fi on the ship (probably expensive and payable per minute) so we should be able to at least check in briefly. I don’t feature any real blogging until we get back but I should be able to whip off a few Tweets midweek to say “Hi, we didn’t sink.”
None of my strange little social phobias have really begun to sing yet either. Not only am I facing the prospect of spending a week with a group of civilians (ie: non-porn people), most of them qualify as “Joe’s friends”, with the exception of one awesome chick who is perhaps becoming MY friend. I have met most of them, liked most of them, and am at least neutral to those whom I experienced no immediate reaction to (and only actively dread one of them, although this person is utterly unimportant in the larger scheme of things and laughably transparent in its efforts to annoy and discomfit). Still, all of the foregoing alone should be enough to set off strange tweaks of anxiety in me that will eventually display itself as chilly reserve and bored stiffness (I’m told I look like an utter cunt when I’m not smiling) until at least the 2nd day out when it’s become apparent that everyone is pretty much ok and not out to mess up my life.
There’s also the chance that Joe will feel like utter shit for the whole week and be unable to join me in gallivanting about our various ports of call. He’s made me promise to go ahead without him, should his stomach issues kick in (and I will) but I’m hoping that having nothing to do for a week straight but relax will be enough to induce a mini-remission of his condition (and again, fuck you Doctor, we’re still sure its Crohn’s) and we’ll be able to do together the things we’ve talked about like horseback riding, snorkeling, sneaky outdoor porn shoots in tropical locations, and the odd random walking tour of random archaeological ruins. But there IS a distinct chance I’ll be tagging along with people I don’t know particularly well.
But nope…..still, nary a twinge.
To add to the fun, it’s also hurricane season and according to the respective forecasts of each of our ports of call, we’re facing chances of thunderstorms all the way through our itinerary until at least Tuesday. Wheee, should I bring Gravol? But, nope, I’m not terribly worried about that either.
AND I’m leaving my cats for a week straight! Piss on you if you’re not a cat person and are sitting there muttering to yourself “Pfft…..so???” For a dedicated cat-mom, it’s upsetting and they’re already becoming clingy. They’ve seen the suitcases, they know something’s up, and I’m already missing them. Joe’s sister will be along every second day to top up the huge containers of food and water I will leave out, and I know they’ll probably sleep the whole time we’re gone, but STILL. They’re my CATS. They’ll be alone. What if the house gets abducted by aliens? What is cat burglers break in and steal them??? I already feel guilty.
But only a little.
Could it….could it BE that I expect to simply enjoy myself *gasp*? Have I enough St. John’s Wort built up in my system after all these months that my usual jitters have melted away? Or has my Id finally realized it’s 37 goddamn years old and finally chilled the fuck out?
Hell if I know, but what I’m mostly focusing on and anticipating is:
- this is my first real vacation, ever, anywhere.
- this is OUR first real vacation, together, anywhere.
- Joe’s boss/partner made like he won the lottery (he didn’t) and, unbelievably, is paying for all of this. And no, sorry they’re not hiring right now.
- this is my first time ever leaving the country for somewhere utterly foreign.
- I’ve never been anywhere tropical.
- Once the take-off is out of the way, I sorta like flying and will probably be staring raptly out the window the whole time. Until the landing, at least, at which point Joe and I will clutch each other as discreetly as possible.
- Even if it does thunderstorm for half of our time there, it’s still going to be 30+ degrees C. Here, it’s already getting down to single-digit temperatures at night. Celcius. And the leaves have begun to change.
- I’m totally psyched at the thought of hanging out with that one chick I like the hell out of.
- I totally want a voodoo doll, if we can find one in Haiti. And no, I won’t name it after you.
- we might be able to get in some sneaky outdoor porn shoots in awesome locations.
- there’s a casino onboard. I’ve only ever seen two before: the one here, and one that hilarious one in Cape Breton.
- I have a sexy new white bikini to show off.
- I have a gorgeous new evening gown to show off.
- Joe’s going to be in a tux twice and will look even more gorgeous than usual.
- I’ve never ridden a horse.
- I’ve never snorkeled.
- I’ve never seen a reef or a stingray.
- I won’t have any housework to do for a week.
- SHOPPING!!
- We’ve got a great stateroom to shoot in, even if we can’t get away with anything outside.
- Joe says he plans to bang the living hell out of me all week long.
Hmmm…nope. Still no anxiety. Gee, can’t imagine why……:D
Enjoy yourselves next week, darlings. Thanks soooooo much for the sweet emails, messages, and Twitters wishing me bon voyage and to have a good trip. Believe me, I plan to!
Mina xoxoxo
